I love the holidays. We spent the Thanksgiving weekend in the Tri-Cities with my aunts and uncles and cousins. It was fun. It was refreshing and life-giving to me. I got to spend time with my family-including my husband and children!! I got to spend some time with my dear friend Sheila, although not enough. I realized I get a great deal of rejuvination from being with my people. My people are the people who call me to be better. To strive for a life not half lived. To see more than meets the eye in this crazy world we live. I am thankful for all of them...you. I am thankful that in this life we have more than we could ever know is really there. There is mystery and wonder still. I am thankful that my husband loves me and cherishes me. That he is always for me even when he wants to be obstinate and stubborn. I am thankful to have a large family that is inclusive and loving. That we enjoy each other's company and want to spend time together. I realize now in my adulthood just how rare and wonderful it is to have a family like this. I am thankful for my grandmother, whom I did not get to see but who made this family what it is today.
I also had a little moment of clarity about giving. I think people ramp up their giving at this time of year but I realized that there may be a call on me to provide more opportunities for this for our church all the time-not just during the holidays. I am still in process of this little nugget but I am pondering it and rolling it around with my God to see if this is really something he would like for me to take on. Pray for me in this please. I so want to heed the call of my God, but never at the sake of my family. I have been a giver of many things but I think I would like to be a giver of opporunities to give....I like this idea. We will see...
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Friday, November 20, 2009
My husband is good...
Check it out. This is the mural on Green street by SCC! If you know anyone who needs or wants some artwork/murals done PLEASE let us know!
Monday, November 16, 2009
FYI...
Your heart matters to God.
I know we have all heard that God wants us to have the desires of our hearts...blah, blah, blah. But really until the last couple of months and a book I just finished it never really seemed...well...relevant to being a Christian. Christianity wasn't about the desires of my heart, was it? But I am seeing anew the power of my heart when it is full and the things that my heart loves are fulfilled in some way, no matter how small, that I am much more able to give, fulfill my call or even hear His voice. Praise the Lord our hearts matters to Him for they are the Treasures of His Kingdom!
The Lord their God will save them on that day
as the flock of his people.
They will sparkle in his land
like jewels in a crown,
How attractive and beautiful they will be!
-Zechariah 9:16-17
I know we have all heard that God wants us to have the desires of our hearts...blah, blah, blah. But really until the last couple of months and a book I just finished it never really seemed...well...relevant to being a Christian. Christianity wasn't about the desires of my heart, was it? But I am seeing anew the power of my heart when it is full and the things that my heart loves are fulfilled in some way, no matter how small, that I am much more able to give, fulfill my call or even hear His voice. Praise the Lord our hearts matters to Him for they are the Treasures of His Kingdom!
The Lord their God will save them on that day
as the flock of his people.
They will sparkle in his land
like jewels in a crown,
How attractive and beautiful they will be!
-Zechariah 9:16-17
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Hakuna Matata!
Casey and I went to The Lion King last night with his two brothers and their wives. It was a great show and almost as entertaining was watching Casey and Nate try to stay awake...it is long. It started at 8 pm and that worked out great for Lori and me because of the babies. But the boys put in a long day and were struggling to stay awake.
It was great though. The costumes are fantastic and full of color. There was lots to enjoy and it was funny too. It was mostly just nice to get out with my husband and go somewhere and sit next to him for a couple of hours and not have anything to really worry about. I did enjoy being with him. The other great part was that Daisy and Jack stayed the night at Grandma's house and so when I woke up to Lucy this morning I fed her in peace and quiet. Then when she went down for her morning nap it was still...peaceful and quiet. I sat on the couch drinking tea and looking at a magazine. What a beautiful start to a Saturday morning.
On an unrelated but magical note. It snowed yesterday. The first snow of the winter and the kids got on all their gear and went outside. Lovely to see the snow on the ground and magical to watch it fall in the dark of the evening. I hope it is gone by the end of January.
It was great though. The costumes are fantastic and full of color. There was lots to enjoy and it was funny too. It was mostly just nice to get out with my husband and go somewhere and sit next to him for a couple of hours and not have anything to really worry about. I did enjoy being with him. The other great part was that Daisy and Jack stayed the night at Grandma's house and so when I woke up to Lucy this morning I fed her in peace and quiet. Then when she went down for her morning nap it was still...peaceful and quiet. I sat on the couch drinking tea and looking at a magazine. What a beautiful start to a Saturday morning.
On an unrelated but magical note. It snowed yesterday. The first snow of the winter and the kids got on all their gear and went outside. Lovely to see the snow on the ground and magical to watch it fall in the dark of the evening. I hope it is gone by the end of January.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Present
Tonite I was present. I felt a little frantic going into the evening time, as it can be such a scramble and by the time I get kiddos to bed I am wiped. Despite my francticness brought on by Casey leaving just at dinnertime to be out for the night...building...Lucy screaming for her dinner...building...no kitchen sink because Casey tried to replace it and a part was broken...building...we sat down to dinner and made it pleasantly through! And after I got everyone bathed and baby to bed I left my kitchen D-I-S-G-U-S-T-I-N-G and watched The Incredibles with the kids. I didn't even freak out that they went to bed after 9! I just sat there and enjoyed the movie with Jack on my lap and Daisy curled up on the couch. It was awesome! They repeated all the parts they thought were funny. I didn't get up to do anything. I worry about that damn kitchen being clean way too much. I always do that instead of sit down with the kids. Lame. I have been much more of a participant these last few days rather than a facilitator. Not sure what that means just yet. But I sure feel like as moms sometimes we just make sure those moments happen for everyone else and never let them happen for us. Why is that? I think some are better at this than others but how did we get sucked into thinking we weren't supposed to make those moments for ourselves?
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Halloween goodness
Here are my beautiful and joy-filled offspring and my husband in their costumes. Jack is Kung Fu Panda. Daisy is a blonde Mulan...she did not appreciate the wig. Lucy is a flower. If you can guess who Casey is I will send you a prize! We dressed up with our care group! It was super fun...sorry no pics of me...actually I'm not sorry at all. Enjoy!
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
The Easy Life
On Sunday Casey made a comment about how if life were easy it would be so fun. That comment has been haunting me ever since. I can't stop thinking about it. I started by thinking, 'would it'? Because if life were easy I would wake up and take a nice long hot bath and then read a great book for as long as I wanted without any interruptions. My day would continue in a similar fashion and then I realized...I am describing not having kids or a job! Which led me to think maybe my life would be easy but would I be fulfilled? Would I be empty?
Then I got to thinking about my friends and how even though they may live in a different city, state or country they are so precious to me. Why? Because they have endured with me through the toughest years of my life. We went through a terribly uncomfortable situation together or we just share our grieves in life together. All the things that are hard are shared with these precious people. They are valuable to me because of the hardness of life.
Similarly, I realized, my children are valuable to me because of the difficulty of raising them. The difficulty in making everyday choices on their behalf to model for them how I would like for them to make choices in the future when I am not there. To keep them safe...oh to keep them safe. Simply because when I even think of someone harming them I want to throw up. How can I say I would rather have it easy? Could I give up all these people in my life to have it easy? Would that really be more fun?
I struggle with school sometimes with Daisy but then there are days...like today...where we talk about something so random (idioms) and I see her light up at the silliness of life. She couldn't believe people would say it's raining cats and dogs. (she thought maybe they say that because sometimes the rain is as heavy as a cat or a dog.) That was fun to see her that way and be with her in that. But would I really appreciate this moment if all the moments were like this?
I think people would give up on life more if it were always so easy. Maybe. Maybe not. There would be less interesting things to talk about. There would be less heartache or maybe none at all. Then I realized. Maybe that is heaven. A place where I get to keep all the people I love and the richness of my relationship with them but without the fear or doubt or paranoia. Where everything is easy and free and lovely.
I think that is why I get so mad at people here on earth who take the easy way instead of the right or the good way. People who turn their backs on the thing they know to be right because it is too hard. I don't always choose the right thing but I try to. But I think I realized that life is not about being easy; life is about seeing what life can be on the other side of the struggle. We were put on earth with these people at this time with these struggles for such a time as this...
Then I got to thinking about my friends and how even though they may live in a different city, state or country they are so precious to me. Why? Because they have endured with me through the toughest years of my life. We went through a terribly uncomfortable situation together or we just share our grieves in life together. All the things that are hard are shared with these precious people. They are valuable to me because of the hardness of life.
Similarly, I realized, my children are valuable to me because of the difficulty of raising them. The difficulty in making everyday choices on their behalf to model for them how I would like for them to make choices in the future when I am not there. To keep them safe...oh to keep them safe. Simply because when I even think of someone harming them I want to throw up. How can I say I would rather have it easy? Could I give up all these people in my life to have it easy? Would that really be more fun?
I struggle with school sometimes with Daisy but then there are days...like today...where we talk about something so random (idioms) and I see her light up at the silliness of life. She couldn't believe people would say it's raining cats and dogs. (she thought maybe they say that because sometimes the rain is as heavy as a cat or a dog.) That was fun to see her that way and be with her in that. But would I really appreciate this moment if all the moments were like this?
I think people would give up on life more if it were always so easy. Maybe. Maybe not. There would be less interesting things to talk about. There would be less heartache or maybe none at all. Then I realized. Maybe that is heaven. A place where I get to keep all the people I love and the richness of my relationship with them but without the fear or doubt or paranoia. Where everything is easy and free and lovely.
I think that is why I get so mad at people here on earth who take the easy way instead of the right or the good way. People who turn their backs on the thing they know to be right because it is too hard. I don't always choose the right thing but I try to. But I think I realized that life is not about being easy; life is about seeing what life can be on the other side of the struggle. We were put on earth with these people at this time with these struggles for such a time as this...
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