Tri-Cities

We went to Tri-Cities this last weekend for a short but pleasant weekend with family. We went straight to a great farm in Grandview where we got to make our very own DELICIOUS apple cider. I got to throw apples into the 'get your fingers the hell out of the way machine' to grind them up and Daisy turned the top on the press to get the cider out. Casey walked around getting ideas for paintings and enjoying the farm while watching Jack and Lucy do the same. We are enjoying our fresh nothin' added to it cider and I am regretful I didn't get more.

We also spent the afternoon/evening with some more of my family. Casey got to play a hilarious game of croquet with a couple of my uncles. My uncle Mike, we learned, has a hidden dark side that only comes out whilst playing this particular game...weird. We got to have teas and snacks at my Aunt Cathy's home and celebrate my cousin Annie's 9th birthday. It was great fun to be together again after what seems like a very long absence from family gatherings. (I started to think about this when we were singing to Annie and I noticed that myself and several others in my family were teary and barely getting through the singing. Especially when we came to the end where in our family we sing, "may the dear Lord bless you, may the dear Lord bless you. May He bless you and keep you, may the dear Lord bless you." Precious memory of my grandma.) Which is something we are known for and brag about generally. Since my grandmother died last December there hasn't been much gathering happening. It is a shame. Our family is strong and marked by love and yet that seems to be far from people's minds right now. I hope and pray that we can come back together again. We never know what is going to throw us off course. Confuse or muddle the truth that we know and have known for a long time. My grandma was the constant reminder of what really matters...relationships...especially family. And some have lost sight of that. It is hard because I think my own Dad sort of started the confusion. So again I am troubled by my role in this and what it means for him. I have learned that my family isn't going to pass any of his 'sin' on to me but it is so very upsetting to constantly be witness to my Dad's foolishness. I heard an amazing sermon this last weekend about honoring our father and mother. I wish I could process it all and tell you about it, but I can't. I just know that it has me thinking yet again what that looks like for me and if that is even possible.

One more!

So, as most of you know I am prego and having our 4th! Yeah! Exciting and terrifying just like the last two times...three times. The first was definitely the most terrifying and I didn't even have to give birth. We are excited and yet very humbled. God has blessed us that is for sure. We have no doubts about that. He is growing our family and we don't know when He will stop. We have taken to a different viewpoint on family and children as of late. Well, maybe more me than Casey. He always wanted a big fam at least 3 maybe more like 5 or 6; I remember him telling me that and thinking-like Hell 6. But here I am saying we are having 4 and I don't know if there will be more. God is in control right? Then if I say He is but don't give Him this part of my life-what is that? He can be in control of all the things I don't see fit to control myself...I don't think that is going to fly. I honestly don't want to have faith like that. So, when 3 children seems like plenty and "financially" enough we are venturing to trust our God who hasn't let us down yet. Praise God for children...all of them.

These days...

We are trying to get back into the swing of school after multiple illnesses and Uncle Jordan being here. Finding a Midwife and investigating that route. Trying to figure out what to do with my garden for the winter. Going to a cougar game on Saturday! Which was super fun even though they are horrible. We got to sit in the second row on the 40 yard line! Great seats. We will try to get back to our routine...even though we are leaving for Tri-Cities on Thursday. But in more interesting news...the rooster is gone.

Casey offed him. He rung his neck...can you picture Casey swinging the rooster around by the neck to break it. Now you may be wondering if this is a good idea. Cutting means blood and running around with no head. We didn't want that. So, breaking it was. I cooked the breast and tried to make stock. It would have been good, but I had to leave to go to my appointment and left Casey in charge of turning it off. Well, he let if go down to nothing and burnt the veggies and stuff in the pot. I was so disappointed and sad. Oh well. No crying over burnt stock, right? I did get the meat out first though. Just so you all know the chicken breasts you buy at the store are NOT NORMAL. That is about 3 chickens worth. Crazy and disgusting. No chicken should have breasts that big.

Every day it seems like I discover something new about the food we eat and I realize I have to make a choice about it. I shared some of that with my brother and just got a text from him asking what Corn Maltodextrin was? I mean doesn't that just say it all...why would we eat these things if we have no idea what it was. And if you saw those ingredients laying around would you say, "oh yeah, go ahead and put some of that in!" I don't think so.

Changes

My kids are growing up and changing can you tell! Yikes! Casey took these and I love them.



I hope you aren't tired of me changing my blog all the time. It seems as though I have been. Anyway, I am just in a season of needing/wanting a lot of change. We have been working on the exterior of our house and it is looking better and better everyday. Which is awesome! I painted the living room and hallway. And am in the process of choosing a color to repaint the bathroom and got a new shower curtain and shelf and am really looking forward to a different look in there. But the whole point is I have just been changing as much as I can. I don't really know why. I have just felt compelled to change things. It has been good and I think I need change pretty regularly. I don't really know how people do sameness all the time and LIKE it! Crazy. LIfe is too short to live it the same all the time. Isn't it? Changes are good. They make us see things just a little differently and make us feel fresh and new without much effort or money. Especially as moms who do the same things all the time and most of the time in the same order at the same places. That is important. Try it today! Especially if you don't normally. It might make you feel better. Plus if you move the couch you will clean under it and everyone can feel good about that! Happy changes.

Attacks

Did you know you are under attack? I am. You probably are too. It is always there...lurking.

I have been struggling to get some time to do the things I should and want to. I just started another year of Soulcare and told my story on Tuesday. My brother is here. Last night ALL of my kids threw up. Daisy took the first shift starting in the morning and was in and out all day. Then puked right before bed. Lucy's turn was from 10:30pm until 2:30am and Jack's was from 3am until 8am. No one has puked since THANK GOD. But like I said before under attack. Some things are just meant to drive you down into the pit of despair. 3 hours of sleep is a good way to start but an even better way to drive you straight to the bottom. I am tired but I think just getting a little of this off of my chest is helping. Sorry to be a Debbie Downer but I just thought I would say to you all.

Pay attention. The attack is always there...even if just a small little movement towards the bigger idea; a little victory that clouds your judgement on the truth. Watch and pay attention. Gaurd your hearts for they are the wellspring of life.